The capitalism is exploitation of humans by humans. Communism – in opposite!

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Vladimir Putin goes to bed one evening and Stalin appears to him in a dream. Putin asks Stalin for some help with the state of Russian economy, crime, etc… Stalin says:
“Round up and shoot every male between the age of 21 & 30 and then paint the inside of the Kremlin blue.”
Putin asks:
“Why blue?”
Stalin retorts:
“I knew you would ask me about the second part first”

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One day God was hanging out at the Pearly Gates with St. Paul.

“I need to find someone to run for president,” he said after a while.

Attentive to his boss’ needs, St. Paul started naming off a few qualified candidates.

“Nah, I want that guy,” he said pointing to a drunken Texas governor pissing off a balcony.

“You’ve got to be kidding,” said St. Paul, “Not only is he dumber than a box of rocks, he’s got drinking and drug problems.”

“I don’t care,” said God, “This is the guy.”

Perplexed, St. Paul asked: “What is the problem, Lord, art thou angry with the Americans?”

“No,” said God, “I made a bet with the Devil that I could get a village idiot to run for president.”

“But won’t that work in the Devil’s favor, oh Lord?” Paul asked.

“That’s all right,” said God, “he’ll never take Florida.”

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