Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house;
Everyone felt shitty,
Even the mouse.

Dad drinking whiskey,
Mom smoking grass,
I had just settled down
For a nice piece of ass.

When out on the lawn
There arose such a clatter
That I sprang from my piece
To see what was the mater!

He came down the chimney
Like a bat out of Hell,
I knew right away
That the fat fucker fell.

He filled all the stockings
With pretzels and beer,
And a big rubber dick,
For my brother the queer,

He rose up the chimney
With one hell of a fart;
That son of a bitch
Blew the chimney apart.

He swore and he cursed
As he flew out of sight;
Shouting “piss on you all,
Have a hell of a night!”

Merry Christmas!

Funny Jokes:

1. Night before Christmas
2. Twas the night before Christmas At The White House
3. Represent Christmas
4. The Lord Will Save Me
5. Military Christmas
6. Christmas is Canceled
7. Have a Microsoft Christmas
8. ‘Twas The Night Before Xmas- Redneck
9. dont fuck my daughter
10. The 12 bugs of Christmas
11. The Twelve Bugs of Christmas
12. sandwiches
13. Go ask mommy
14. dirty convo
15. If companies run Christmas

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