Insult Jokes, Clean Funny Jokes
Your wife’s hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You can’t get married to your sweetheart because there’s a law against it.
You think loading a dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
Somebody hollers “Hoe Down” and your girlfriend hits the floor.
If a tornado hits your home and causes $10,000 dollars worth of improvement.
Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, “Hey y’all watch this.”
You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia boss.
You think a woman who is “out of your league” bowls on a different night.
If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
I’d like to leave you with one thought, but I’m not sure you have anywhere to put it!
I’d love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
I’d like to see things from your point of view but I can’t seem to get my head that far up my ass.
He’s not stupid; he’s possessed by a retarded ghost.
He is the kind of a man that you could use as a blueprint to build an idiot.
If you were my dog, I’d shave your butt and teach you to walk backwards.
You’ve got an IQ of 2. Pitty it takes 3 to grunt.
It’s impossible to believe that the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.
If this student were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.
The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.
When your daughter’s IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
The student has a “full six-pack” but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
I would not allow this student to breed.
Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.