Q: How do you scare a man?
A: Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice.

Q: Men will brag that there are women waiting by the phone at this very moment for their call. Who are these women?
A: Women working at 900 numbers.

Q: Where is the best place in a book store to find a man who is handsome, a good lover and a stimulating partner?
A: In the pages of a romance novel.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he’s God’s gift?
A: Exchange him.

Q: Why is the book “Women Who Love Too Much” a disappointment for many men?
A: No phone numbers.

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.

sahilGeneral25 Apr, 2008No Comments

Reason’s why it’s great to be a woman

Free drinks.

Free dinners.

Free movies.

Speeding ticket? What’s that?

New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life.

If you have to be home in time for Melrose Place, you can say so, out loud.

If you’re not making enough money you can blame the glass ceiling.

You can sleep your way to the top.

You can sue the President for sexual harassment.

It’s possible to live your whole life without ever taking a group shower.

No fashion faux pas you make could rival The Speedo.

Brad Pitt.

No one passes out when you take off your shoes.

Excitement is only as far away as the nearest beauty-supply store.

If you forget to shave, no one has to know.

If you’re dumb, some people will find it cute.

You have the ability to dress yourself.

If you marry someone twenty years younger, you’re aware that you look like an idiot.

You’ll never have to punch a hole through anything with your fist.

You can quickly end any fight by crying.

Your friends won’t think you’re weird if you ask whether there’s spinach in your teeth.

There are times when chocolate really Can solve all your problems.

You’ve never had a goatee.

You’ll never regret piercing your ears.

You can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

You know which glass was yours by the lipstick mark.

You get to hate Kathie Lee in the way only another woman truly can.

sahilGeneral21 Apr, 2008No Comments

A woman was staying at a hotel and she decided to go sunbathing on the hotel roof. When she laid down her bikini top fell off… she didn’t care anyway because no one will see her. After a while she heard footsteps, it was the hotel manager… she hurried up and covered herself up and the
hotel manager said.’We don’t mind if you sunbath up here, but we would appeciate it if you would keep your bikini top on!’
And she said,’ No one will see me anyway.’
And the hotel manager said,’I hate to break this to you….but you’re laying on the dining room skylights.

sahilGeneral2 Apr, 2008No Comments

Mr. Baldwin, the biology teacher called on Mary, “Can you tell me the part of the body that, under the right conditions, expands to six times it’s normal size, and state the conditions.”

Mary gasped and said in a huff, “Why, Mr. Baldwin! That is an inappropriate question and my parents are going to hear of it when I get home!” She sat down, red-faced.

“Susan, can you tell me the answer?” asked Mr. Baldwin.

“The pupil of the eye, under dark conditions,” said Susan.

“Correct. Now Mary, I have three things to say to you.

First, you have not studied your lesson.

Second, you have a dirty mind.

And third, boy are you going to be disappointed someday!”

sahilGeneral31 Mar, 2008No Comments

THREE WOMEN — ONE GERMAN, ONE JAPANESE AND A HILLBILLY WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA.

SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND.

THE GERMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED.

THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY.

“THAT WAS MY PAGER,” SHE SAID. “I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM.”

A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG.

THE JAPANESE WOMAN LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, “THAT WAS MY MOBILE PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND.”

THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FELT DECIDEDLY LOW TECH. NOT TO BE OUTDONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE.

SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET PAPER HANGING FROM HER BEHIND.

THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER.

THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FINALLY SAID, “WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT, I’M GETTIN’ A FAX!

sahilGeneral29 Mar, 2008No Comments

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?

ELEPHINO!!!

adminGeneral14 Oct, 2005No Comments

talk to the booty because the hands are off duty

adminGeneral14 Oct, 2005No Comments

i know this one girl who’s forehead was so big, that when she dreamed it was like a friggin drive in movie.

adminGeneral14 Oct, 2005No Comments

Q: How come G-Unit couldn’t get on the bus?
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*****
******
A: cause they didn’t have 50 cent

adminGeneral14 Oct, 2005No Comments

what is the difference between mashed potatoes and pea soup

anybody can mash potatoes

adminGeneral14 Oct, 2005No Comments