Public service announcements around the world.

USA: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your children are?”

Italy: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your husband is?”

France: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your wife is?”

Poland: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know what time it is?”

No tags

CLASSIFIED ERRORS, from a small-town daily:

(Monday) FORE SALE – R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 555-0707 after 7 p.m. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap.

(Tuesday) NOTICE – We regret having erred in R. D. Jone’s ad yesterday. It should have read: One sewing machine for sale. Cheap: 555-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him after 7 p.m.

(Wednesday) NOTICE – R. D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in his classified ad yesterday. His ad stands corrected as follows: FOR SALE – R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 555-0707 and ask Mrs. Kelly who loves with him.

(Thursday) NOTICE – I, R. D. Jones, have NO sewing machine for sale. I SMASHED IT. Don’t call 555-0707, as the telephone has been disconnected. I have NOT been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper, but she quit.”

No tags

These are supposedly actual classified ads that have appeared in various papers across the world.

LAWYER SAYS CLIENT IS NOT THAT GUILTY.

GROUND BEAST: 99 cents lb.

OPEN HOUSE – BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON – FREE COFFEE & DONUTS

FREE PUPPIES…PART GERMAN SHEPHERD, PART DOG

FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL – 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR DOG

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG.

GERMAN SHEPHARD. 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.

CUTE KITTEN FOR SALE, 2 CENTS OR BEST OFFER

FREE: FARM KITTENS. READY TO EAT.

KITTENS 8 WEEKS OLD – SEEKING GOOD CHRISTIAN HOME.

No tags